The quickest way to kill your dreams


Last week I had this crazy flood of heavy energy – sad, mad, frustrated, irritated, depressed – you name it and I feel like I felt it. And from what I understand I wasn’t the only one with this strange surge of low vibrations.

But what I found interesting over the course of the week is what happened when I just let those that icky, uncomfortable-ness run its course. I didn’t allow myself to wallow but rather I recognized them, felt them, acknowledged them, and let them be heard. Instead of pushing them down and pretending they weren’t there , I just let them be. This is a new experience for me, but I was finally able to own up to the fact I was agitated and instead of using every ounce of energy fighting it, I actually invited it to sit for a while.

And that’s when everything changed.

It didn’t take much but a gentle voice whispering from deep down inside that decided to speak up during a walk to day 18 of my 40 days of yoga adventure, “Stop denying your dreams.”

Whoa! What the heck? I was stunned and awestruck. Of course my small self tried to rise with a, “Who me? I never deny my dreams, I’m a go-getter,” rebutttle. But she was quickly put right back in her place with a thunderous well of emotion manifesting in the fall of a single tear landing heavily on my cheek. It was as if that flood of heavy energy I invited to sit for a while finally decided it had sat long enough and it wrapped itself up tightly in a bath of water and salt and pushed itself out.

Full disclosure.

I admit I’ve been stuck in this place of doing what’s safe. I’ve been doing things like subscribing to other’s ways of living that don’t necessarily feel right to me but seemed on the surface to make things “smoother”, and I’ve been saying yes to activities that feed my bank account rather than fuel the spark I ignited a couple of weeks ago with the launch of MoreSeekers.

Somewhere along the line I seem to have decided my dreams were “shelf-worthy” and not as important as momentary mediocre happiness.

Honestly, I’ve let the pressures of the everyday dictate my life. I started prioritizing everything else over and above my dream. I let small thoughts creep in and displace my vision for the future. I’ve been denying my dream time, effort, and attention – all requirements for success.

The result? In a matter of three weeks my passion began to fade, my creative muse only visited sparingly, and I started hiding – doing everything I could that would allow me to avoid owning up to living my dream rather than just wishing. The saying, “Where your attention goes, grows” was definitely playing whack a mole with my ambitions and desires. Every time I’d lift my head to even remotely imagine my exciting future something else would whack it right back down.

It was true. The whisper was not lying. I was denying my dream.

I was holding back. I was allowing the “should’s” can’ts” and “have tos” lead the way. My small self had my attention and I was opting for safe rather than super-fantastic.

And of course, this wasn’t a new experience, I’ve been here before. I’ve let what I really wanted slip through my hands because I listened to something else besides my inner most desires. My past is littered with dreams dead because I was trying to fit into someone else’s reality.

As I walked, the tear dried, and I made a pact to stop denying my dream. In that moment I re-kindled my passion, my creative spark, my core desired feeling – Gloriously Golden.

This is what I know for sure – dreams without action are mere wishes. And, another thing I know for sure is dreams need to be protected. Our entire lives, even the internal software system of our brains, are designed to hold us back and make sure we don’t make a mistake or get hurt. Yes, dreams challenge us. They challenge every aspect of our existence, even our genetic code. That’s why most people only hold dreams at a distance; because wishes for someday don’t set us up for potential failure, until their actually realized.

So, what can you do to protect your dreams? Well, dream protection is an interesting job because it requires special skills:

  • Desire. You must get crystal clear on what you want. So many of us go through life not ever really knowing, clearly articulating what we want. One of the best places to start is identifying how you want to feel – because most of us aren’t in touch with that either. I recommend Danielle LaPorte’s Desire Map as your first step. Through using the Desire Map I got up close and personal with how I wanted to feel and the result was six kick-ass core desired feelings (CDFs as they’re affectionately called) – Soul-full, Divine Harmony, Peace, Courage, LOVE, all laddering up to my North Star CDF, Gloriously Golden. Keeping them close at hand and using them as my internal “feel good” guidance system, helps me keep everything in perspective and really helps me get exactly what I want – and I never feel the least bit guilty about it.
  • Create Intent. This is a super important one so read carefully. From your heart (not your head), write your dream as an intent, not just a simple goal. And the secret is to write it as if it’s already happened. Then re-write it every single day until it’s actually happened. This is where Quantum Physics comes in. Because there are actually 14 dimensions of space, quantum physics has proven that what we want already exists in one of the other dimensions. So, by wholeheartedly setting the intent and reminding yourself everyday you’re doing the internal work (creating new neural pathways) and the outer work (drawing what you want into this dimension of space) to actually make it your reality.
  • Foster Purity. Dreams are essentially just energy, they’re thoughts of what we want for the future. In order to make them happen we have to ensure the energy stays pure. The best way to do this is to hold your intent close to the vest, don’t divulge the details or what in your heart-of-hearts you want to happen because despite people’s best intentions, their energy starts to mix with the energy of your dream and sometimes it can create un-necessary loop-de-loops, and even dream death.
  • Share Your Passion. AND, at the same time, don’t keep the overall idea and desire a complete secret. While you don’t want to share the details you do want to share your passion and the overall desire. One thing I’ve come to realize is sharing what you want with the ones closest to you, is not only helpful at making them a reality, IT IS ESSENTIAL. If those who care about you know what you want, and understand why you want it, they can actually be a huge asset in getting you to the point where you can openly receive it by supporting you, holding you accountable, and most importantly linking you to opportunities you might not otherwise be introduced to. Find someone you can confide in, share openly and honestly, and let the miraculous Universe conspire in your favor.
  • Disciplined Action. The best way I know to foster a dream into reality is to create action and do it in a disciplined way – create a routine and rarely, if ever, falter from that routine. It doesn’t have to be rigid and feel stifling, nor should it be a habit that becomes rote and automatic. What you do need is to create a container, a space, the opportunity for you to make, create, accomplish, BE your dream. Truthfully, this is where I made my biggest misstep – I opted out. I let my morning routine, the place I do my best thinking and creating,  fall by the way side to other’s desires and feelings. Sadly, in the process I lost my oomph and nudge forward and my daily soul igniting shot of creativity, which is the ignition switch for my dream.

For me, I’ve re-connected to my dream, to how I want to feel, and what I really want – to inspire and guide people in the direction of their dreams, to never settle, and to live a life of MORE, unapologetically and vividly. To do that, I’m back into my morning routine, which always starts with an early morning writing session, quiet time with my dog, a sweat session (yoga or running), meditation, and a nourishing breakfast – the writing being key. Even if it’s only a simple writing exercise it still gets the juices flowing and opens the floodgates of creativity, the fuel for everything I do and everything I am.

And the biggest action I took was sharing my dream with my husband. In the span of one week, I realized I’ve never shared with him my passion for my dream. By sharing it with him I’ve realized he has the ability to support me and hold me accountable in ways I never imagined – the most importantly he gets excited because he sees my passion. Dreams are contagious if we let them be [tweet].

Have you been denying your dreams? What can you do to declare them into reality? I can only imagine what might get to happen for you if you let go of denying, opened up and gave them a little space for possibility, and created a real chance to be realized.

Double High 5s + MORE:dreams,